Buffalo Ballet (live John Cale cover)
And a thank you to all who came out for the Slow Wonder shows!
We just finished the run of The Slow Wonder shows (4 of them!) and it was a ton of fun. A ton, I tell you! Big thanks to Lilah Larson, Booker Stardrum (his real name!), Adam Schatz, Zach Djanikian and Phil Palazzolo for joining me. This Substack is arguably the spark that started it. I wanted a cool carrot to dangle in front of prospective subscribers and came up with the idea of a 'Slow Wonder' vinyl reissue. When I found out that Matador was up for it, I thought "Why not play a few shows?". Decided it would be DC, NYC, Boston and Philly, all cities within a few hundred miles of home. Did not know if there was any interest or money in guarantees but my agent looked into it and there WAS some interest. Enough to make it worth doing.
I am traditionally not the guy that goes to the merch counter after the show. That's basically shyness, that awkward feeling of standing there while people look at me. Yes, it's my job. I know. This time I thought I would. I'd stand out there with my sharpie and help move some vinyl, sign them, sign anything! It helped having Landlady (AKA Adam Schatz) there with me. Solidarity! It was actually very rewarding to meet fans. It was the best part of the trip. When you're at home and you're looking ahead at the tour, it gets reduced to numbers. How much am I making? How many tickets am I selling? You may look at the numbers and think "Not high enough! I want bigger numbers!"
The thing is, though, if there are 100 or 200 or 500 people that really want to see you, that is not to be taken lightly. One shouldn't complain that the numbers aren't high enough. Meeting the audience members after the show really pushed that point home. Every time anyone told me a story of what the album meant to them, I wanted to cry. All this music, at the heart of it, is a flare shot into the sky, you hope someone sees it. You reach into a private place and try to turn it into something public. You're trying to connect with someone or something. Shoot the proverbial flare gun at them. No, that doesn't work.
This whole thing is about connection, it starts from that place. I'm grateful I get to do it. I have had a nice run. Music took me to the place where I met my wife, to a new home, to a family. I owe everything to this path I've been on, however winding, however many dead-ends and disappointments. It all led to here and there is so much here that I love, treasure and value. I don't make nearly as much money as I used to make, but do not weep for me. Some of that is a changing industry, some of that is the fact that I'm over 20 years into a career not known for having any longevity, that can be a little age-ist if you don't manage to cross over into legend status. I am not complaining (it kind of sounds like you are, Carl), I still make money, I just have to work a little harder for it, create more of my own momentum.
I appreciate it. That's what I'm trying to say. Thank you for subscribing to this Substack. Thank you for listening to and supporting my music. Thank you for coming to shows. When I ask for your money, whether it be here or through albums and shows, I hope I'm giving you something that is worth it. I'll take your pity as well, sure. Your charity, that also works. There are still copies of 'Slow Wonder' available, by the way. A couple hundred? Going to leave those cool limited edition colored vinyl copies there until they're gone. I'm in no rush. Let the products sell themselves, D Boon once sang. Join my Substack vinyl club! Another exclusive drop coming in not too long!
All that said, here is a live version of 'Buffalo Ballet' by John Cale, from his album Fear, straight from the soundboard on this last run. Sung by me, played with my pals. Lilah Larson on vocals and guitar. Booker Stardrum on drums (obviously). Adam Schatz on piano. Talking about connection, making new friends and playing music with them is one of the greatest joys of this life. Sometimes you are thrown together with new musicians and for a few days they are your best friends in the world. You're a team, a club, a weird little family. Right on.
I promise I will post more, now that I’ve finished these shows and I’m not so much in shock about the Great American Shitshow. I’d like to think that I could entertain you with my own shitshow of sorts.